RuPaul's Drag Race: You gotta be talented!
|Written by Lauren Cheal|
|Thursday, 01 March 2012 18:00|
Last week, there was some drama between Sharon Needles and Phi Phi O'Hara. The Princess was (rightly) sent home.
There is some brief chatter before the mini-challenge where Phi Phi is a bitch to Sharon Needles again. If she is going to choose a dog's name, I am going to make references to her as such.
Ru introduces the mini-challenge and when the ladies partner up, Willam is left with Madame LaQueer, which she believes is a punishment for some "unchristian" act in her life. The ladies will have to put make-up on their partner while handcuffed together. The ladies take mug shots with their messed up faces and some people look genuinely frightening. Willam and Madame LaQueer end up taking the win with a dye-bag explosion look.
This week's main challenge is to star in a sitcom, and Madame LaQueer and Willam get to choose the two teams (at random draw). Madame LaQueer assigns Kenya to play the part of a guard, and she immediately has problems with reading the script because of the language. Madame LaQueer is also trying to pull off a British accent, but she has a thick Puerto Rican accent and it is terrible.
On the other side of the room, Willam mentions that he has been on TV like 75 times, and it is grating, as always.
The big judge is Max Mutchnick, co-creator of Will and Grace. He gives the first group feedback, mostly helping Jiggly to be funnier. Jiggly really seems a bit dumb. He also spars with Willam, who shamefully and annoyingly tells Max to take her headshot on the way out (after pissily correcting his pronunciation of her name).
The second group comes up and they have problems pretty much all around. Kenya doesn't understand the plot and can't be understood (language-wise) at all. Milan is not a good actor and keeps giving a faraway look that is weird. Sharon Needles can't get her lines right and argues with Ru and Max, and Madame LaQueer effs up a bunch of her lines and isn't able to mimic what Max wants her to say. The only bright spot on this clearly losing team is Dida Ritz, who nails all of her lines and brings the comedy too. A definite step up from her dull performance last week.
As the girls prepare for the Mainstage, Sharon Needles goes to tell Phi Phi about the crap she said about her on the runway last week (god knows why). Phi Phi blows up and they scream it out. It is not particularly fun to watch.
Judges: Ru is looking fabulous in a royal blue sequinned number with giant curly hair. Billy B. and Michelle Visage are here as our regular judges, and they are joined by Max Mutchnick and Nicole Sullivan (of Mad TV fame).
Phi Phi O'Hara: Phi Phi looks 100 on the mainstage again. She also looks somewhat cross-eyed. Her white gown is boring.
Latrice Royale: Latrice looks absolutely FIERCE in this one-shouldered, dark blue sequinned gown. Her ass is all sorts of working it.
Dida Ritz: Dida's look showcases her hot body, and the dress isn't really too bad. The problem with her look, as always, is her crappy wig. This one isn't styled very well and looks all tore up. Not so good.
Madame L aQueer: Madame LaQueer looks really awful in a lime green gown that is offensive to the eyes. It is just a horrible colour, and her face isn't good either.
Willam: Ru comments that Willam is serving Taylor Swift, which is really all she ever serves. Her look is boring.
Kenya Michaels: Kenya's runway look is a bright yellow dress with pretty purple flowery trim. She pulls it off with all 3'4" of her tiny frame.
Chad Michaels: Chad has gone for a red wig that looks exactly like the red Cher hair that she sported around 2000. Ru calls it very Florence + The Machine, but I only see Cher.
Jiggly Caliente: Jiggly's look is a bright yellow bubble dress, and it isn't the best. She might be in trouble again if her team loses, but they clearly aren't going to.
Milan: Milan is wearing a cool gold gown with edged Star Trek-inspired shoulder pads. She looks pretty gorgeous.
Sharon Needles: Sharon is going for an old socialite look, and she looks a bit Joan-riversy. I don't hate it.
The judges deem Team Willam the winners, and Latrice Royale is singled out as the best of this week. The entire team is safe. They critique the losers, and Kenya is called out for not being butch, at all. Milan is critiqued for not being interesting enough, even though he is a trained actor. Madame LaQueer is told that she couldn't do the accent that she was trying for (which was unnecessary). Dida Ritz is praised for her performance yesterday, but critiqued for her sloppy hair (as always) and dry knees. As the wise Michelle Visage points out, "if you are going to go bare-legged, lotion up, girl. Lotion up!".
Ru calls out Madame LaQueer for her crappy management and acting, and she is up for elimination. Milan is also put in the bottom two, and I am not really sure why. Kenya was much worse than her in the acting challenge, and they both look good here. Sharon would be my next choice (even though I like her) because she struggled with the acting and her look isn't the best. Nevertheless, it is time for Milan and Madame LaQueer to lip sync for their liiiiiiives! They are syncing to "Trouble" performed by P!nk. Milan brings a crazy amount of energy and performance, while Madame LaQueer stands there and points at herself and everyone else. Jiggly helpfully tells us that she is classified as a "Pointer Sister". Hilarious stuff.
Milan is told to shante, and stay, while Madame LaQueer is sent sashaying away.