Because Doctor Who Fans Really Are That Nit-picking

Every television show has its rules that must be followed ritualistically.

They could be rules that you’re not aware of, they could be rules that are actually written down somewhere – they could even be rules that you just know, deep down, are right.

Doctor Who has rules, no matter what you might think, and it’s a little less than reassuring to be provided with evidence that suggests that when those rules aren’t followed, things go badly wrong.

The new series of Doctor Who, guided back into view under the skilful hand of Russell T. Davis, is excellent – and in a couple of episodes, it manages to test the rules a little, toy with us and give us a different perspective. In “Love And Monsters,” for instance, the focus isn’t on the Doctor – the narrative is led by Elton, and the episode is about his life, and what happens to him. In “Blink,” it is Sally Sparrow, not the Doctor, who is given a life-changing task.

But those episodes both stuck to the golden rule of Doctor Who -- the rule that every successful episode must adhere to. It is, quite simply, this:

The Doctor always saves the day.

This may seem obvious, but in fact it is integral to the story. The point of the whole programme is that the Doctor comes in and saves mankind, and that is what makes it such good viewing. We all know that, however scary the monster of the week (be it a little boy in a gas mask asking, “Are you my mummy?” or an upturned dustbin calling, “Exterminate!”) may be, the Doctor will defeat it. He may do it with the help of a few well-chosen accomplices, but when it comes down to it, it will be up to him to rescue the situation.

In the end, it was the Doctor who appeared at the end of Love and Monsters to save humanity, and it was his ingenuity that tricked the Weeping Angels in Blink into looking at each other. Even when it’s not all about the Doctor, he’s still there, behind the scenes, keeping a watchful eye on things.

But then we come to the connected season finale episodes: “The Sound Of Drums,” and “The Last Of The Time Lords.”

Let me make this perfectly clear: I love Doctor Who. I love Russell T. Davis. I’m in love with John Barrowman, I adore David Tennant, and I can’t get enough of John Simm. I like Freema Agyeman. I like post-apocalyptic storylines. I really love a good villain.

So how did all those good things get together, mix around a little and end up so…mediocre?

The trouble is, these two episodes take one look at the Golden Rule, and decide that they can do without it, thank you very much.

If you don’t know the episodes, or need reminding, this is the basic set-up: a Timelord called “the Master” has become Prime Minister of England through brainwashing the nation, and is in league with a terrifying new race of alien robots. He unleashes said robots on the world, enslaves humanity, and ages the Doctor so that he is powerless. Martha escapes, motivates the population of the Earth, and saves the day.

Look closely over that synopsis.

Now look again.

Can you see what’s wrong? It’s right there, in the last sentence.

“Martha escapes, motivates the population of the Earth, and saves the day.” Now, let us go back to the Golden Rule – this is where the finale breaks down.

The human race saves the Doctor, not the other way round. Presumably, this was meant to be groundbreaking, and interesting, and clever – unfortunately, it’s the crux of the problem. The notion of using the power of one word to save someone is too big for this show to handle, and when the Doctor is triumphant, hovering in the air and standing surrounded by light, you do have to wonder if the producers are taking it a little too far.

It’s a real shame, because if the finale had stuck to the rule it could have been brilliant – two Timelords locked in a duel – and it’s a sore disappointment to fans like myself, who were looking forward to an explosive end to the series.

So Doctor Who can do wrong after all. Russell T. Davis should stick to the rule, and do what he does best – cheeky, quirky episodes with hints of darkness. It was going so well, and then this happened…and with the casting of Catherine Tate (who is a fine comedienne, but definitely not companion material) finalized, I’m beginning to worry for the future of my favourite show.