I just watched last week’s The Vampire Diaries last night, so I don’t really have time to give “Klaus” the full recap treatment. But! I do need to talk about how the sun and the moon curse doesn’t exist because this shit is genius.

I’ll admit that I wasn’t too jazzed about a Klaus backstory ep. It seems like filler to me. I should have known better, though, because Vampire Diaries don’t play that way. “Klaus” wasn’t as action packed as “The Last Dance” or my hero “Masquerade,” but it did give us the answer we’ve all been waiting for: why the curse matters to Klaus. As an Original, he’s not bound by the sun, so what else is there? I’ll tell you what: there is no sun and moon curse. There is only one curse, it’s only on Klaus, and it’s to quell his vampire-werewolf hybrid nature. YES! He’s Scott Speedman in Underworld! Sadly not played by Scott Speedman, but still. Here’s how that goes.

Klaus and his six brothers and sisters, including ELIJAH, make up the Originals. Don’t ask me how because Elijah didn’t want to get into the specifics. Except Klaus, you see, is the product of an affair between their mother and the father of a werewolf clan (werewolves predate vampires, it turns out). A vampire-werewolf hybrid is too powerful and has no natural balance, so the servants of nature (i.e. witches, now called eco-warriors) put a curse on Klaus to limit him to vampire. Klaus seeks to break the curse because it’s all about power. It’s all about power being, of course, a conclusion I can get behind.

So Klaus and Elijah (no word on what happened to the other Originals) planted info about the sun and moon curse in as many cultures as possible to hope to turn up the doppelganger and the moonstone. No word yet on why werewolves and vampires are actually limited in this way (another witchy curse? Power of suggestion like in that Season 1 Supernatural episode?). We all know that they found Katerina, who bolted with the moonstone (right?), before they could get the ritual going. What we didn’t know is that Elijah, because he’s essentially decent despite being a vampire, had the witches find a way around having to kill Katerina for the ritual (no word on sacrificing vamps or wolves. Maybe they made that part up, too?). There’s some mention that Elijah may have had feelings for her, but I saw no real evidence beyond not wanting to kill someone if you don’t have to, which is more “basic human decency” than “love” in my books. Klaus’ books, however, put him above peeps with heartbeats so, despite this, he tells Elijah that they are going to kill Katerina for funsies. Shits and giggles, even.

As we all know, Katerina found out about this bad brew and ran, and Klaus – this is seriously the turning point in Elijah and Klaus’ relationship – blames Elijah. Blames Elijah to the point where Klaus is like, “You tipped her off, and I’m going to kill you if you don’t find her,” but, like, millennia of brotherhood and working together to break the curse go down the drain because Katerina wasn’t so keen on dying. Honestly, what majestic drama queens.

Because I like Daniel Gillies and the way he underplays his scenes (he doesn’t quite achieve Denis O’Hare levels of world weariness, but he tries), I’m going to chalk up the fact that Klaus fell flat for me to Joseph Morgan, specifically the chemistry between Morgan and Gillies. One of the reasons that VD works so well is the interplay between Paul Wesley and Ian Somerhalder. The relationship between Stefan and Damon is always so alive and chafed and changeable, and Morgan and Gillies were none of those things. On one hand, it seems unfair to compare them because the latter two have had all of one episode to play pretty wide range of emotions, and the former have had the better part of two seasons to be awesome. On the other hand, it’s a pretty huge, season-long arc that they’re hanging on these two, and their explosive emotional rift should be the source of some major drama. Plus, the show makes a point of comparing the falling out between Elijah and Klaus to the looming showdown Stefan and Damon, so serves them right if the comparison doesn’t come out favourably.

Speaking of, last week one of my viewing companions, after Damon was all, “I. Will. Always. Choose. You,” remarked that Damon is so aggressive in his love for Elena. What I find striking about it is how obvious and in-your-face he is but with the unwritten rule is that everyone will silently deal as long as nobody says it out loud. Sure enough, the minute Stefan goes, “Thank you for being in love with my girlfriend,” they are instantly at each other’s throats. I don’t know that Elena’s respect is what Damon will never have, but I do think that everything that’s gone down with Andie (poor girl) is further evidence of why Damon is, at this point, still no good for Elena.

Anyway, it’s almost time for another ep, so we’ll leave Jenna finding out about things that go bump in the night, Klaus’ physical return, Daughter Martin’s arrival, and Alaric’s maybe-death for another day. At least Tyler comes home. I’ve been missing our little wolf.

OH! I did want to mention that love is apparently a vampire’s greatest weakness. I can only assume this means that they don’t love like the humans.