Fourth of July means no True Blood recap, but thankfully there's other crazy vampire news: the Vulture is reporting that Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, and Taylor Lautner will receive an obscene $25 million for Breaking Dawn and Breaking Dawn 2: Demon Baby Boogaloo against a 7.5% cut of theatrical gross.

Remember when Jim Carrey earned a then-unheard of $20 million for The Cable Guy (a notorious flop deserving of a cult revival)? Nowadays, you'd be hard pressed to think of a recent worthwhile Carrey vehicle (that will likely change if I Love You Philip Morris ever gets a release date in Canada and the U.S.), and you could be forgiven if your mind temporarily fritzed at the mention of his name. I can't decide what's more bizarre: how little obscene paychecks have gone up in the last 14 years or the possibility that one of these three is the next Jim Carrey. One of them is the way to making The Truman Show, another to The Number 23. Quick! Guess which is which!

A few weeks ago, I went to see Shutter Island. In the wing seating, a lady started yelling at some people as they exited during the end credits. It wasn't clear exactly what she was on about, but, naturally, my sympathy was with the older lady over the "young punks." As a remix of Dinah Washington's "This Bitter Earth" played over the end credits, my viewing companion and I discussed how copyright issues over this very song kept Killer of Sheep, one of the greatest American movies ever made, from being seeing by the wider public for 30 years. Unfortunately discussing exactly what we are hearing during the end credits was too much for the now obviously old lady, who started yelling at us to "STOP TALKING!" Just in case you were wondering, according to crazy old ladies who scare away even their minders with their yelling, "OUTSIDE IS FOR TALKING!" You know, during the end credits in a mostly empty theatre. I'll admit to you that I was actually upset by the lengthy tongue lashing we got for, in my opinion, doing nothing wrong. 

This morning I read this story in the L.A. Times, and apparently it could have been much worse. Not to make light of the situation because it is terrible, but a meat thermometre? They left and came back with a meat thermometre? How desperately do you want to stab someone that you could leave and come back with the thing that tells you if your turkey is done? Also, stop talking on your cell phone, violent jackass.