I get that it's the last season and all, but moving Supernatural to Fridays at 9 p.m.? After the apparently immortal Smallville? When a show's so bad that even I stop watching it, how bad do you think it must be? The Vampire Diaries followed by Supernatural was one of the most perfect fits ever seen on that network. The WB once paired Buffy the Vampire Slayer with 7th Heaven, for pity's sake.

Also, there is no point in yet another Nikita since this one is unlikely to star Roy Dupuis, famous Canadian hottie actor.

Gossip Girl remains as it was, so at least we can comfort ourselves with that.

The word is that someone, somewhere finally got around to greenlighting Hobo With A Shotgun as a feature, which is pretty much the best news ever if you've seen the trailer (a (Canadian!) contest winner that was including in the full-length Grindhouse). Actually, let's watch it right now, shall we:

PROMdemonium 2010 is the radical, community-oriented, gender-bending, bike-loving, enviro-humping, queer-diggin, slow dancing, big dress wearing prom that you never had.

This year's PROM is on Saturday, May 1, from 8:30pm to 1:30am at St. Brigid's Centre for the Arts and Humanities.

***WE ARE LOOKING FOR VOLUNTEERS NOW. We need people to: poster, decorate, assist with tasks the night of Prom, and do other various other tasks as they arise. Volunteers get into Prom for FREE!

Excellent news, fang-bangers: TwiCon got booted from its location in downtown Toronto thanks to this little thing called the G20 summit, so they relocated to Landsdowne Park. Say, what? Yup, Ottawa was on the radar, and now it's the place to be June 25 to 27 for TwiHards, TwiMoms, and people who like Sam from True Blood. He's going to be here, and, as your ace vampire reporter, I'm going to have to be there. It's the least I can do. Just like showing you this photo from Eclipse.  You're welcome.

In our seemingly endless Gossip Girl drought before the March 8th return (still more than six weeks away), pretty much any GG news is exciting, and that goes double for this scoop: Billy Baldwin has been cast as Keith van der Woodsen. He's apparently going to show up and . . . I don't even know. Be amazing. Okay, he's apparently going to show up and cause trouble between Rufus and Lily, which is fine by me as Rufus sucks, and do . . . something with his daughter. And maybe his son? Eric's constantly in need of plot material. So, is Billy a good fit for the role even though the last we saw him he looked like the man at left? Things we know about him:

• Might be (probably is) from money.
• Had a brief affair with Lily's older sister before meeting Lily.
• Did cocaine in the 80s with Tom Cruise.
• Fathered Serena and Eric.
• Divorced Lily.
• Put a ton of effort into ignoring his children, particularly his daughter, since then.
• Is a doctor with MSF even though he apparently produced music videos in the 80s.
• Has a child's writing rather than a doctor scrawl.
• May have had an affair with Lily last fall.
• May or may not be aware of/involved with Carter Braizen.

Now, it sounds to me like this is right up Billy's alley. Keith can come back, have an affair with Lily, epically fail at parenting his children (as all parents do on this show unless they aren't related to the child, cf. Elanor/Jenny, Lily/Chuck), maybe take a run at the Bass fortune (or the Rhodes fortune? Wonder how CeCe feels about Keith), and then disappear in a puff of smoke. Sounds great.

Also, this allows me to imagine that Carter didn't go off to work on an oil rig after all but to find Keith and bring him back once and for all. There was a whole thing about "being a man" in his exit line that I didn't get, but I bet this would make sense to the writer who came up with that nonesense. Plus, Carter's pouty mouth and beltless trousers make for excellent television.

I'm delighted to tell you that it didn't take all week to figure out how Vampire Diaries went from so-bad-it's-good to genuinely good. It was episode six, "Lost Girls." But first I had to slog my way through episode five, "You're Undead to Me." Okay, slog is a little harsh since the episode featured a car wash, which meant it featured lots of toned arms, but there's little of note except:

Obviously, no one in their right mind. But dear Serena never had a right mind to begin with, so naturally she told Trip they needed to stay away from each other, made out with him in a elevator, apologized to his wife for causing trouble, managed to get the upper hand on her mom, and eventually ran off with Trip in a limo while wearing a cat suit with black lace down the middle so that her ample cleavage got enough air. Because if there's one thing Serena does at Thanksgiving, it's fuck everything up.

All of this, plus the following:

• Dan confirms that CeCe's heart runs on "secrets and gin," giving viewers new life goals.
• Dan realizes that he does indeed love Vanessa, so Gabriella (the formidable Gina Torres) decides to try her hand at parenting for the first time and tells him to stay way if he's unwilling to commit to something serious. Hilariously, how her daughter might feel about Dan is never a consideration for either of them.
• Eric's full out evil involves texts like, "We have to strike now" and eating a big bite of pie. Enjoying desserts on holidays is like enjoying the fruits of the Devil every other night of the year.
• Chuck tries to mend the current Waldorf rift by selling Blair out to Eleanor, explaining that he bought that particular champagne because Blair told him to. Both ladies studiously ignore him. 
• Chuck also advises Nate to tell Serena how he feels, threatens Serena and Trip, calls Nate out on stealing from him, and eventually ditches Blair (and sweater shopping with Harold and Roman!) for a heartbroken Nate. Aw, Nathaniel is his true love.
• The new Empire-based Bass Cave has a motorcycle is decoration. That's even better than Logan's suit of armour.

For yes, indeed, yet another episode ends with a heartbroken Nate. Poor guy confessed his feelings to Serena and begged her to stay, but, as mention, she drove off with Trip instead. While it will doubtless turn out next week that Trip is crazy and Nate will be entirely justified in once again punching a family member in the face,* it would be hard to make the right choice with two Vanderbilts giving you the glad eye.
*I just wondered when he would finally punch Grandfather in the face, but I realized that Grandfather is probably a boxing champ who would wipe the floor with Nathaniel.

Dear Everyone I know Including the Internet,

What gives? 

How I Met Your Mother is freaking brilliant, and you don't bother telling me about it?  You let the show get like five years into their run before it becomes even a blip on my radar?  You have failed me!

Ever since Bob Dylan finished the encore of his November 7th show in Kitchener with "All Along the Watchtower", I've been thinking about the power of the song and its lyrics.  

Some dismiss the lyrics as nonsense, but I can't accept that argument when lines like " Businessmen, they drink my wine/Plowmen dig my earth / None of them along the line / Know what any of it is worth"  seem so obviously applicable to Dylan's own thoughts on life during the post-motocycle accident period in which the song was written.

A quick Google search termed up this excellent close reading of the lyrics by Herb Bowie.

As noted in the analysis, "Dylan’s accomplishment here is nothing less than amazing."

Agreed.

Which is unfortunate. The film isn't great, but there are definitely three or four huge laughs in there (Peyote Ewok, I'm looking at you) and it is a story with real heart to it.

That said, the studio missed a HUGE opportunity in the marketing of this film. Forget about the all the fantastic cameos (Shatner!). Forget about Seth Rogen playing multiple characters. Forget about all of that.  The studio could have advertised one thing and on thing only, and this movie would have been a hit!

Yes, ladies and gentleman, Fanboys features Veronica Mars in a Slave Girl Leia outfit:

As one of the multitude that is dying for Mad Men's return (August 16, and yes, I have marked my calendar), whiling away the hours until its return is as painful as watching Sal hit on Ken right in front of his wife (seriously, I almost cried). Until we can know what's happening with the takeover and Don and Betty's new baby, we have to make our own fun. The lovely people over at AMC have given us Mad Men-ize yourself. As you can see, Peggy and Pete look happy to see me (does that mean Pete's alive?!), Don is Don, Roger's amused, and Joan looks suspicious. My actual hair doesn't look like that, but I couldn't bear to part with the leopard skin pillbox hat (or my cigarette or my martini). What? It's the '60s! That's how they do business, and I'm sure my ciggies are toasted.

I don't know about you, but I know what my favourite KISS moment of all time is: Bill and Ted return from the future, bearded and finally ready to become the legends Rufus always told them they would be.  The Princesses, the Stations, the Good Robot Usses, and Death all join in as Wyld Stallyns rock out to KISS's "God Gave Rock n Roll to You II".  Incredible stuff.

BANK OF AMERICA STAGE
7 p.m.: Beast
9:30 p.m.: KISS

If there's one thing Michael Bay should know, it's blowing people away. Also, blowing things up. Imagine how explosively upset he must have been when he sat down at his computer to type a grammatically confused email to Paramount re: their sucky publicity campaign for Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. While his complaint about the trailer might make him seem like a man after my own heart (because seriously, what was stopping them?), this line is my favourite:

"Over the years Jerry Bruckheimer mentored me on event movies - he had a mantra - 'A studio that does not make it an event, will it into an event, thinks the audience will just show up, will always be bitten in the ass.'" 

Only Jerry Bruckheimer and Michael Bay would have a mantra that is easily three times longer than it needs to be and misses the point.

It has just occurred to me, at this very moment, that there is a chance some of you out there have not read the Scott Pilgrim books.

Look, I told you that you were going to like the new Star Trek movie and you did, right? Same goes for this.

When the Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World movie gets released next year, Mr. Pilgrim is going to be huge. Everyone will love the movie, and you will look like a fool for not having been "in the know" earlier.

MAY the 4th be with you!

Like most things concerning Shakespeare, there is a fair amount of controversy regarding his birthday.

We know he was babtised on April 26, so it would make sense that he was born a few days earlier. As such, most people celebrate his birthday today, April 23 (which also happens to be St. George's Day).

While we aren't sure whether or not he was born today, we do know one thing for sure... he died today, and 400 years later, his art is still celebrated as one of the greatest achievements in the English language.

The Carleton University basketball team won their sixth CIS championship in seven years, beating the University of British Columbia Thunderbirds 87-77 at Scotiabank Place yesterday.

The Ottawa Citizen and the Ottawa Sun have the full story.

 Congratulations to my alma mater!