In “Easy J,” Gossip Girl tries to tell us that Jenny Humphrey has been missed. No, she has not. She’s gone just as quickly as she arrived, which is exactly how we like it. This week’s Gossip Girl also featured Nate shaking it for Cellblock 6, Serena successfully attending a class, and a tragic end to Chuck and Blair’s war.

Blair’s Psychic Hotline

Blair has a Wait Until Dark dream that we both see and hear her explain in detail to Serena. Thanks? Anyway, she thought Chuck was the dream attacker until she reached back and grabbed a handful of ratty blonde extensions. Blair also takes this opportunity to call Serena a slut like she does every episode lately, and I’m getting a little tired of it. I wonder why Serena doesn’t just tell her to eff off but remember that it’s probably to avoid getting axe murdered. Blair also inaccurately describes Serena’s hair as being in “missionary disarray.” Serena has sex hair all the time, so it’s kind of a wonder how they cooked up beach hair for her this episode and called it sex hair. Anyway, Serena’s like, “Yes, but we didn’t fuck!” and Blair’s like, “My dream is more important than your real life!”, so Serena tries to use her Serena-magic to amalgamate the two by suggesting that they talk it over while taking a cab to school. Serena plans to get there on time since she knows Cab-Thieving Colin won’t have anyone to pour into a taxi this morning. I’m briefly amazed that she may have concocted this scheme just to neutralize Colin but no such luck. Also, no takers. Blair has somewhere else to be.