Last week, Mimi Imfurst became more annoying and was thankfully asked to sashay away from our televisions.

She Mail arrives and it is the Ms. Ru who is so divine telling the gals about their upcoming challenge. Apparently, a good queen is an informed queen. The mini challenge is to make a quick (very quick, 10 minutes) drag look for the red carpet. Two of the ladies go about creating fake vajays to flash to the camera. Is this really necessary? Basically, most of the ladies flash their bits, and grind on young studs. Stacy Layne appears to flash what is a real breast, and I am confused by it. Carmen Carrera and Stacy Layne are the top two and will be team captains for the next challenge, which is to shoot a morning show. Debbie Matenopoulos is a guest judge and will help the ladies find their way around a newsroom. 

The teams are as follows:

Fabio’s departure last week is sad for a few reasons, not the least of which is that it spells the end of the bromantic relationship blooming between Richard and Fabio. He was never going to win, but he made for good TV. Carla is enjoying her recent win and thinks that she has what it takes to win this thing. I am rooting for her.

Quickfire: Create a cookie for Cookie Monster, Elmo and Telly.

Special guests for the Quickfire are some of the characters from Sesame Street, Elmo, Telly and Cookie Monster. Padma can’t even get the challenge instructions out because she interrupted by Cookie Monster who is very excited about the days’ challenge. Create the best cookie you can in 45 minutes. The winner will take home $5000.

Last week, Phoenix went home and there was drama because Mimi Imfurst thought that she was awesome, when really, she is just kind of annoying. Good times!

We start today with a mini challenge, which I am just going to sum up in a few lines because no one cares about them. The ladies have to create a fashion leotard out of only duct tape. The three plus sized queens team up together (Mimi, Delta and Stacy Layne). They barely get any tape over their big bones, and Delta and Stacy don’t really want to be with Mimi. Manila and Carmen win.

The real challenge this week is to create an inspirational workout video. The two winners pick teams.

Manila’s team is Raja, Mimi, Shangela, Stacy Layne, and Alexis. Highlights from their taping include Shangela being funny and not annoying, And Alexis being cute with  a lip-gloss inspired workout. Lowlights include Raja’s weird man voice and Mimi.

Fabio and Mike are very bitter about their loss to Antonia, and claim that her mussels were actually a French dish. Hating! There is no talk of Tre’s exit.

Quickfire: Create a Unique Fondue. 30 Minutes

Let me just warn you now: I freaking love cheese fondue. It is the food of the gods. I will be judging these “unique fondues” very harshly. God, I want fondue now. Their guest judge is themselves. They will have to pick the best and worst dishes. There is no more immunity.

Boldly Tuck Where No Man Has Tucked Before

Welcome to week two! I get very excited when the opening credits role on this show because I know I am in for some zany, yet fabulous times. The ladies dwell on Venus D-lite’s exit and people mostly react by having it set in that the competition is on. The first shemail of the day comes in, and a gorgeous lady Ru tells us that the girls will have to “boldly tuck where no man has tucked before”. Immediately following this, the man Rupaul comes into the room and it is jarring, as always. The ladies are asked to pair up into teams and will have to communicate psychically to match answers about their partners clothing (that they can’t see).

Raja and Delta: I think these two are friends  from before because Raja tells us that Delta knows all about her (including how many cab drivers she has slept with). They get 1 out of three questions correct. Mariah and Phoenix are next--we only hear two of their questions, but they only get one correct. The remaining pairs are Carmen and someone who is unnamed, Stacy and Alexis, Shangela and India, and finally Mimi and Yara. The winners are Phoenix and Mariah. The next challenge is to shoot scenes for the movie Drag Queens in Outer Space and the two winners pick teams.

Make them an offer they can’t refuse

No one is particularly torn up about Marcel’s departure, and Mike is particularly glad to see him gone. I still have mixed feelings about his exit…who’s hair will I make fun of this week? We are down to 9 contestants, which still seems like a lot.

Quickfire: Make a plate that will be judged on presentation and aethetics only

Well, have I got a treat for you. I will be recapping a reality competition like no other, RuPaul’s Drag Race. Airing on Logo, RuPaul’s Drag Race takes 13 fabulous drag queens and has them compete to be America’s next drag superstar. The show is part modeling competition, part sewing and costuming competition, and part personality competition. It is difficult for the written word to do this show justice, but I am going to try my best. I don’t know a lot about the drag world (although I recently catalogued Shims in Hollywood), but I encourage you to join me as we learn about what makes a fabulous drag queen.

First up, let’s meet our ladies.

Delta Work: Delta is a self-described “big girl” and wants to be the next RuPaul. Those are some fabulous pumps to fill.

Well it has taken 5 weeks, but finally, my wish has come true. We have only 1 Dale and 1 Tiffany left. Last week, Jamie and Red Hair Tiffani got the boot for their failures at the beachside fish fry. Wow…as Carla points out to us, there are only 3 women left at this point (herself, Antonia and Tiffany). We learn that Antonia has earned the nickname “The Black Hammer” because people she works with on teams seem to end up going home (both in her season and this time around as well). Hilarious.

The chefs head to Le Bernadin (Eric Ripert’s seafood restaurant), and observe a fish cleaning master at work. They seem genuinely awed by his skills.

Quickfire: Fillet and portion 1 cod and 1 fluke (to Le Bernadin’s standards) in 10 minutes

Last week, Casey got knifed. Everyone, including Jamie, thought she would be going home. I would much rather have Casey back this week than Jamie, who seems to have given up. There is some smack talk between Marcel and Dale about how Dale didn’t cook enough food for the challenge and how Marcel thinks he should have one. In a bit of an argument on the rooftop, Marcel drinks Bombay gin straight from the bottle. Marcel is super worked up about it, and Dale (to his credit) just walks away.

Elimination Challenge: Catch and Cook Fish for a Beach Party

It is super early in the morning and the chefs find out they will be fishing in Montauk. They meet Padma and Tom and find out that they will have 5 hours to catch as many fish as possible and then they will cook them on the beach for 200 guests. Oh and it will be a double elimination!

Spike’s knifing last week is not the subject of very much debate, but people do talk about how Angelo can’t help but get his hands into other people’s food.

Quickfire:

The chefs will face off against Tom Colicchio in a speed challenge to cook an entire dish. Tom cooks very quickly and throws something at Padma during his prep. Not classy, Tom! He cooks black bass with clams, tomato and zucchini, in 8 minutes, 37 seconds. The winner of the challenge gets immunity AND a Toyota Prius. Not too shabby!

Last week Jen lost her shit when she got eliminated for making a bland meal. People thought Jaime shouldn’t have left the challenge to get two stitches. Let's get right to the action!

Quickfire: Mise en Place Race and then Create a Dish

Someone is impressed that the guest in the kitchen is David Chang. I don’t know who this guy is, but apparently he has restaurants! The quickfire is being done in teams (listed below) and they start by prepping items, and then have to create a dish with them. The show is challenging me to figure out what mise en place means, and I am refusing to accept said challenge for now. There will be no immunity to the winners. The chefs fly through all sorts of prep and the speed of the knives makes me fear for their digits.

Last week Elia was eliminated for redoing her elimi-dish, but forgetting to cook the fish. Woops! Richard was DQ’d (sadly, not Dairy Queened) for going over a time limit probably because of some haters. Read about all of the fun here. 

First up we have a guest in the kitchen, and Spike is quick to tell us that the guest is a Jonas brother. Ha. He calls them Rock Stars. Is that true?

Quickfire: Make a midnight snack for kids (at The American Museum of Natural History ) (45 minutes)